Rules Of Etiquette To Uphold During A Rabbi Funeral

By Harold Lee


According to the funeral practices of Jews, a loved one is burred about 24 hours after they pass on. This makes it unusual to have a viewing ceremony or even wakes. Before the service begins, family members practice Keriah, which involves tearing a visible piece of cloth or black ribbons in honor of the life of the deceased. This also symbolizes their grief during a rabbi funeral.

If you are not a Jew, this does not mean that you cannot attend the funeral of a dear friend or a close relative to your friend. It is even so vital for you to have a good idea of what to expect and also what people will expect of you. To begin with, say as little as possible. Even better, it is allowed to say nothing at all to the mourners.

You can choose to wear a smart casual outfit with flat shoes, especially if you want to attend the graveside ceremony. Because the Jews move directly from the chapel to the graveside and from the graveside to their homes, arrive at the service minutes in advance and offer your comforts if need be. It certainly is not polite to hold the morning family back with handshakes and sympathies.

It is okay to sit in the chapel and speak in low tones before the service begins. The idea is to maintain a low key and this is a rule you do not want to forget even if you hook up with your buddies. Additionally, put your phone aside and switch it off once the service starts.

As mentioned earlier, your presence is appreciated and this means it is okay for you to just listen. Very little is required of the congregation and there will be someone conducting some psalms, prayers and reading the eulogy. The stories about the rabbi may bring about moments of light laughter amid the sadness of saying the final goodbye.

When saying goodbye to a rabbi, the service will in most cases take place inside the chapel. You therefore do not have to be in attendance during the graveside ceremony. It will only take ten minutes or less and the few chairs available are meant for the morning relatives.

Jews host a Shiva about seven days after the funeral. If you choose to attend the home gathering, again, the most important thing is your presence and it is okay to stay for half an hour or less before leaving. Bringing some food with you is a good gesture because it will save the family from shopping and cooking as they grieve. Simply avoid meat and shellfish and play safe if you do not know the Jewish food laws.

The Jewish laws demand that one lives a good life when they are alive. They never talk about the afterlife so do not bring up the topic. You are also likely not to see bouquets of flowers all over so if you desire to make a kind gesture, choose to make a donation in respect of the deceased rabbi.




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